September 2011 essay

Think back for a second. When we were young everything was new to us. Each day with unexpected events that were going to unfold. I remember being fascinated by even the smallest of things. Every detail of the event of the moment.
Sometimes however, life can seem monotonous. Go to work, eat, sleep, do what your use to, see the same people, blah blah blah. When we were little everything and everyday was exciting, different and new (unless they showed reruns of Saturday morning cartoons, then there was a little monotony but still exciting, again). My Goal is to have a child’s mindset. Sounds rather funny but by looking at each day as a new, exciting adventure, boredom and “getting into a funk” is impossible. Don’t get me wrong I love some of the routine things I do. Routine however does not lead to change and if there is no change, nothing changes. There is no room to grow, expand, and learn if you don’t get outside your comfort zone. I hate yet love that comfort zone. It’s good at times but it takes reminders (at least for me) to get out of it. When I was little I had one goal, to have fun every day, no matter what. Even now the goal is the same. Guess I’m just a big kid. I think it’s important to take each day this way. Right now, writing this is my fun for the moment that I’m writing it. Big geek what can I say. Play every day. It doesn’t always have to be what your use to. We are all use to walking the way we walk. Step outside your comfort zone and walk differently on occasions. Never change who you are, but remember to always experiment. Do your very best at whatever the change of play is and the effort you put forth is a reward in itself. Immerse yourself and get involved in the activity. View the change as a chance to grow. Find fun in the moment. Now that’s a good motto to live by.

Focusing on the details
-Barton-

Waves and Training

I recently went to the beach for some r and r only to realize that you don’t always get what you want. In this case it was a good thing. I wound up battling the surf and sun. Fighting as it was to get into the water to ride the waves. It was a great workout in a surprising way. It brought me back to the days of my young childhood that was spent at the beach. Such fond memories flooded into my brain. Play is all we seem to want to do when we are little but as we age we need to remember to keep things in balance and show humility and modesty to the best of our abilities. Of course always having fun and looking on the bright side of things is always in order. Play however, can be rather exhausting.
Tiring myself out till I passed out under the umbrella was great. Instead of an internal , mental battle that is usually accompanied with running, this is external, just you verse the sun and the waves. Waves always seem to win, never giving up, never tiring and I thought running was tiring.
I also did a beach run for the first time and found it to be very easy compared to the epic battle with the waves. Very relaxing and rejuvenating. It may have been the sound of the waves, or the softness of the sand or maybe the heat of the sun. But in my opinion the beach is a cure all of all types of illness, from mental to physical. The sun, sound of the waves and the taste of salt on the palate reminds me of a sense of freedom and completeness. It’s a place where two worlds collide into each other causing an orderly, consistent disorder. But once you get past the disorder, past the waves, the open water stretches for what seems forever. A real endless pool for you to swim and lose yourself.
-Barton-

July 2011

Experiment in your Lab

You are a scientist! Whether you enjoy it or not is up to you. You can continue to learn, experiment, and love your work and life. Or you could just go into your own lab, punch in some data and leave without showing any real interest. It’s your chose. Like an ameba we all get absorbed in things that interest us. One of my interests happens to be sharks. It by chance also happens to be shark week the week I got off from work…sweet!
Its interesting to try and learn new things. Initially we may say and convince ourselves that we don’t like a particular activity without even giving it a real chance. The Truth is that if we give that activity more time, tough it out so to speak, we will start to develop a love for it. The more we involve ourselves in something the more we come to love it. Of course we will migrate back to the things we love the most but you will learn more about that particular activity and more importantly about yourself. Another benefit is that you wont get burned out on the things that you do love. Rest and take a break from them once in a while. Don’t be lazy but reasonable with yourself. Try something new today.
-Barton-
“Remember to forget”

(Mango)

During a particular ‘mental run’, as I like to call them, where a mix of wind and rain occurs without much warning, I came across a couple of topics as my mind was in the running mode. First was about training. It occurred to me that a long swim is equivalent to a long run of the same duration. I seem to be just as strong with all the swimming I have been throwing in my training as I am when I’m just running. The mental and cardiovascular systems are all there despite the difference in activity. This is great since swimming is perfect for when you have an injury (left Achilles’) or tapering for a race. In swimming you need flexible ankles so it may have actually helped heal my Achilles’s strain. It was either that or the cold water reducing the body’s inflammation. This cross training is great but it’s important to remember that you need to train for your event in order to do your best in it. A good distance swimmer could run a marathon but not with a terrific time. Train for your event.
Second is to find joy in trials and obstacle’s. I kept saying how refreshing this rain run was to myself as well as out loud. You know what? I came to believe it. At times obstacles and trials can cause you to get downhearted. Viewing the obstacles and trials as joyful despite the fact that they really may not be will cause your outlook of the challenge to change. After you finish and accomplish the task you are stronger and happy. Happiness in persevering and when you look back on the challenge you can say to yourself, “It wasn’t so bad.” You actually enjoyed getting out of your comfort zone. It’s all about taking a positive view of things. (Johnny singing) Why do we need the rain, anyway?...
Third. The thought of God providing strength and support in a literal way by the food and water we eat and take in. We all chose what we take in on a daily basis. The example I was thinking about was that you can have a big piece of chocolate cake or a Mango. No doubt the Mango being the better chose. I’m not saying there is anything wrong with treating yourself to chocolate cake. But I’m talking about a big piece. An excess of sugar. So in the example the cake represents evil (Excesses, no control, no balance) the Mango being and representing good (in proportion, control, balanced). In order to not get weighted down and crash we need to have BALANCE AND CONTROL when we do anything. It’s easy to just eat a whole big piece of cake and go into a couch coma cause of it. Learning to save some for later and savor some IN THE MOMENT is a better way to go about it. Eat less, Enjoy, do more. It reminds me of biking. In order not to hit the rock, or go over that edge we need to be aware of the obstacle but not focus on it. Focus on balance and control instead. Focus on where you want to go, not where you don’t want to. Focusing your attention on another person, place, or task will help avoid the ‘evil’ cake. Focus on the Mango.

How to fight a Kraken

How to fight a Kraken

I have always found being in the water a refreshing and revitalizing experience. Splashing, jumping, and fun childhood games flood the memories of my mind when I reflect on the joy of being in the water. It seems weird how staring at a blue line at the bottom of a pool can bring this same sort of childhood revitalizing experience. Last year I was just shy of 100 miles total in my freestyle swimming. So my goal for this year has been to swim 100 miles! Not only is it a goal but something a love to do and will help me not burn out from running and everything else I try to fit in my busy schedule. I have found swimming to help me mentally not to burn out since it is a time to forget about things for a while and listen to the sound of the water and my breathing. I feel it has helped me to maintain balance and not let the fire inside get burned out with all the other things in life. It's a feeling of being on a different planet. Sometimes I feel I have gills and can breathe underwater. ( Note to Self: Do not breath underwater!) Other times it is a struggle to continue and each stroke seems to preventing me from moving forward.

I bought a bottle of Kraken rum as a reward for my new swim goal to be opened once I reach it. I didn't get the rum just because I like it. But rather it brings back to my mind good times with friends and so a bottle of it has special meaning to me. We all got to swim for something J. The motive is not the alcohol however it is my love for swimming. All life is a river, we can chose to swim it or let it take us to where we don't want to go. Sometimes however we need that extrinsic motivation in order to fuel our intrinsic love of something. It really has helped me get to the pool when it was cold and snowy and my bed was soft and warm.

    Having goals is important but sometimes the goals can seem overwhelming. This is why you need to take things one step at a time. Remember to rest and take it easy once in a while. But be reasonable with yourself, not kind, but reasonable. Listen to your body. I sometimes have trouble sleeping because I have a list of things racing through my mind that need to be accomplished for that day. Taking a day to do nothing (4/23/2011) and putting all your plans on hold can be a great way to unwind. This day of forced rest was in itself challenging and a test for someone who is crazy and wants to do everything all at once. Keep breathing air everyone and take one lap at a time.

-Barton-

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

zero run

As the thought of actually being lost entered my brain, I actually began to realize that I was actually lost. I think I missed a turn somewhere on this rainy, thundering night. The day started good. I went to work early with every expectation of getting my Mid-distance training run in after work. Until this girl I was seeing for the past two weeks said she was getting off of work early… that’s how it always starts. So putting aside my other mistress, running, me and her meet at Starbucks. I figured I wouldn’t just give up on all girls. Truth is I was happy to be single. Freedom. Well, long story short it wasn’t me it was her. The normal story which I was actually fine with for some strange reason. After we said our see you laters I felt like I should be upset, mad, something. I missed my run for this? It was thundering and pouring rain out while we were hanging out so I already was rescheduling the run some other time in the week. My mistress needs her time. I looked at my watch looking at a blank screen staring back at me. Just another stressor in my life. A runner’s watch is not just a watch, it’s a loyal friend. Besides shoes a watch is a crucial piece of equipment every runner needs. Time was not on my side. Instead of just stressing out over everything in my life. I, like an airplane on autopilot drove to the mountain bike trail near my job not worrying about all the stresses in my life. It was dark or close to it when I got there, not a soul around except for the bats. Throwing the watch somewhere in the car out of sight I threw on my run get up and started running. It was dark and rainy at least the thunder had stopped by now.
Maneuvering around the ankle high puddles proved to be an especially tricky skill to master due to the unusually tighter single track. Eventually the inevitable happened and I gave way to the puddles in the path, striding right into the muck. The rain kept on coming down. Then the thunder started again. This may sound like the beginning of a scary movie but was actually one of the calmest and enjoyable sensations I possibly ever felt while running. Not to be to hipster, but I felt like one with nature and the trails around me. It was impossible for me to be stressed out about anything that was going on in my life at the moment. Everything was dialed in. Flow. That sensation you get when everything just clicks. I felt like I could run forever. The feeling doesn’t happen often anymore but when it does it is always worth it. Being surrounded by this negative world and its ways can make you feel tired. It may sometimes seem easier to just go along with everyone else. You just have to get started in doing what is good. I repeat, just get started doing what is good and don’t talk yourself out of it. Sometimes it’s hard but by persevering in this beneficial goal you can achieve anything. Just have that positive mindset.
Flow doesn’t happen all the time but it is always something to look forward to and to strive for. Maybe it was the fact that my watch had died so there is no proof that this run actually took place. For all I know I could have dreamt it. That would explain the werewolf I saw among the flashes of thunder. I still never told me mistress why I was late to see her that day, but I was glad I met up even on a rainy, stormy day.
-Barton-

Wilderness 101

As I continued to climb and climb the cold mountain air freezing my lungs I wondered for how much longer it would be till I reached the top of the torrential path I was on. It felt like it was never going to end.
Well it all started when I heard about this 101 mile endurance mountain bike race in Coburn Park, Pennsylvania. I was not able to run cause of my left ankle so no run goal was present, but for some reason I could bike without much of a problem. I probably should have took it easy but I went ahead and signed up for this mountain bike endeavor hoping my ankle would be 100% by the time race day came around. It was close. I learned a lot about mountain biking from my short “training” program. First of all due to mechanicals and lack of motivation and ankle issues I didn’t train anywhere near what you need to in order to finish. In fact the race was the longest time I have spent on my mountain bike ever. I learned a lot about patience, I hope, from the art of mountain bike maintenance.
When the race got closer I started to change my goal and maybe just do some local trails or the like. NEVER NEGOTIATE WITH SELF. I told my mom about the 101 and asked if she wanted to go just to change it up. Something different. She could volunteer and I thought that would be fun for her as well.
After figuring it all out…just kidding. Nothing was figured or planned for this trip. It was very fast planning cause like I said I lost my motivation to do it.
My dad dropped my mom off at my job Friday July 30, 2010. I was sleeping in the car around 12:30-1:30 because I went to work super early to get out early. I awoke to the sound of my mom and dad conversing about my sleeping in the car. They parked right next to me. After some greetings, coffee, and pee breaks my mom and I were off. Sheila also came for the ride to try and led the way. The ride was exciting and fun, not knowing what was in store for the weekend’s adventure. We drove a good distance then got some more coffee and ate our awesome salads and hard boiled eggs (thanks dad). One of the best parts about going away on trips is the coffee during the long drives! My mom and I talked the whole way there never even turning on the radio. It took around 7 + hours to get there cause of the weird summer construction traffic. It was fine however since we were in no rush. I told sheila to take us to the elk aleworks Pub cause that was the only address I knew near Coburn Park, where the race started and finished. We got to the café and asked the closest person, “are you a biker and where do we go to register.” Of course he was and told us where we needed to go. The town was so small that chances are you were there for the race.
Coburn Park was about two miles up the road. It was dark so we almost missed it. When we entered the park we drove around looking for some source of light among all the tents and people. Being so dark and no light it was a little scary thinking I might run over someone or something. We finally parked it next to some older gentleman who after talking to and me getting in a picture with, I found out he was the photographer for the race. So we registered me as a participant and my mom as a volunteer. We got back to the car and ATE! Also had a little of Tuscano 2006 red. We walked around a little taking it all in while having some wine. It was so extremely quiet and peaceful up there. You would think with all the people it would be a party. So we finally settled down and crashed for the night. Well, my mom slept at least. I didn’t sleep even with the wine. I think I was too excited (always happens). I also got up to pee around four times just because I couldn’t sleep. I also got up fours times to pee just to give me an excuse to look up at the night sky. I never saw so many stars and so clearly seen. I felt like Abraham looking at the stars. Being that we increased elevation and that there is no light around it was surely the most beautiful night sky I have ever seen so far. It was the highlight of the trip for me.
The next morning I got up early, set up the bike and hopped on to test it out and proceeded to immediately slip on the loose gravel falling on the ground; it was going to be a long day. After reorganizing myself I went and grabbed two cups of coffee, one for me and one for my mom cause there was only enough for 200 people when 300 people entered the race. After people started waking up we made our way over to breakfast. I had the muffins I brought with fruit. (Trader Joes pomegranate bran, so good!!!!)
So the gun went off and we were on our way. I started in the back because I really wasn’t racing. My goal was to make it to the second aid station @ mile 40. This was where my mom was volunteering. Due to the elevation change, cold morning air, lack of training, I just wanted to get to the first one. It was also a straight climb for miles. I loved it! For the first 20 miles it was mostly gravel fire roads. Once I reached aid station #1 I chatted a bit, took some pictures with the volunteers and was off again, finally getting use to the mountain air. The very first downhill stretch I saw 2 guys that crashed. I stopped and offered help. I offered help and shouts of encouragement to everyone. On my way to aid station # 2 I talked with a bunch of people about a range of things. One lady had so many GU packets that I stopped counting them. Once I got there I went over to the table and ate 2 chocolate chip cookies to start. I think I only had a hammer gel and GU besides water and Gatorade. (Hammer gels are amazing!) So after inhaling the cookies I looked for my mom. Who, after much debt and confusion found out she had no chose but to go to aid station # 4. I thought she went back to the Coburn. So after being torn (I wanted to continue but did the smart thing and pulled a DNF) I really wanted to go more but cause of my ankle, I declined. I also thought my mom was waiting @ Coburn.
Mat and his little Honda Civic (my sag wagon) dropped me back off at Coburn. I found out, finally, that my mom was actually at aid station number 4. So after being denied food due to the fact it wasn’t ready yet I drove to aid station 4 to pick up my mom. I was a little annoyed about the lack of speed and sense of the race directors and everything that was happening. I was also starving… that might have been it. But then I meditated on all the fun I was having and all the positive aspects of the trip that even this whole situation turned from a negative to a positive. It’s all about how you view things, everyone’s beers should be half full. It’s of interest to note that upon arrival at aid station 4, I saw my mom with a walkie talkie. She was calling out orders and also the numbers of the bikers who were making their way through. It was very upsetting to know they had Swedish fish at this aid station. If I would have known that I would have definitely pushed it and kept riding and made it there. When we finally arrived back at Coburn after I stole the apparently nominated race director (my mom), we received our beer and food. Best beer ever and the glass was all the way full :). A bonus was that they also had hummus!
After having seconds we walked around by the river across the field and hung out before we finally set off for the trip home. In my opinion, not knowing what to expect made this trip much better than a planned one. It gives a sense of adventure (…on a plane with no plan right now. lol) I plan on doing this 101 adventure every year but don’t think it will be the same as this first time. I guess I will just have to wait and see.
The Beginning of anything is always the hardest but afterwards I am always glad I put forth the needed effort. Don’t get tired, it’s all in your head. Were always going to be tired if we keep telling ourselves that. Tell yourself you’re not tired and it will become a self-fulfilling prophecy. You can do more than you think. Do something crazy and you will see it’s possible for you to complete the task. Effort is all you need. This 101 endeavor was a tiresome weekend but worth the effort and memories. Mountain biking is awesome, period. It helps you to improve upon ‘control’. We all need to maintain control in our lives. Not letting things, (or in the case of mountain biking, obstacles’) or people (other riders) control you. RIDE YOUR BIKE. Don’t let it ride you. Don’t let injury, pain, or the trials you face let the negative into you. Once you fall off the bike (and we all fall) get back on, learn from the fall and continue riding.
-Barton-