(Mango)

During a particular ‘mental run’, as I like to call them, where a mix of wind and rain occurs without much warning, I came across a couple of topics as my mind was in the running mode. First was about training. It occurred to me that a long swim is equivalent to a long run of the same duration. I seem to be just as strong with all the swimming I have been throwing in my training as I am when I’m just running. The mental and cardiovascular systems are all there despite the difference in activity. This is great since swimming is perfect for when you have an injury (left Achilles’) or tapering for a race. In swimming you need flexible ankles so it may have actually helped heal my Achilles’s strain. It was either that or the cold water reducing the body’s inflammation. This cross training is great but it’s important to remember that you need to train for your event in order to do your best in it. A good distance swimmer could run a marathon but not with a terrific time. Train for your event.
Second is to find joy in trials and obstacle’s. I kept saying how refreshing this rain run was to myself as well as out loud. You know what? I came to believe it. At times obstacles and trials can cause you to get downhearted. Viewing the obstacles and trials as joyful despite the fact that they really may not be will cause your outlook of the challenge to change. After you finish and accomplish the task you are stronger and happy. Happiness in persevering and when you look back on the challenge you can say to yourself, “It wasn’t so bad.” You actually enjoyed getting out of your comfort zone. It’s all about taking a positive view of things. (Johnny singing) Why do we need the rain, anyway?...
Third. The thought of God providing strength and support in a literal way by the food and water we eat and take in. We all chose what we take in on a daily basis. The example I was thinking about was that you can have a big piece of chocolate cake or a Mango. No doubt the Mango being the better chose. I’m not saying there is anything wrong with treating yourself to chocolate cake. But I’m talking about a big piece. An excess of sugar. So in the example the cake represents evil (Excesses, no control, no balance) the Mango being and representing good (in proportion, control, balanced). In order to not get weighted down and crash we need to have BALANCE AND CONTROL when we do anything. It’s easy to just eat a whole big piece of cake and go into a couch coma cause of it. Learning to save some for later and savor some IN THE MOMENT is a better way to go about it. Eat less, Enjoy, do more. It reminds me of biking. In order not to hit the rock, or go over that edge we need to be aware of the obstacle but not focus on it. Focus on balance and control instead. Focus on where you want to go, not where you don’t want to. Focusing your attention on another person, place, or task will help avoid the ‘evil’ cake. Focus on the Mango.

How to fight a Kraken

How to fight a Kraken

I have always found being in the water a refreshing and revitalizing experience. Splashing, jumping, and fun childhood games flood the memories of my mind when I reflect on the joy of being in the water. It seems weird how staring at a blue line at the bottom of a pool can bring this same sort of childhood revitalizing experience. Last year I was just shy of 100 miles total in my freestyle swimming. So my goal for this year has been to swim 100 miles! Not only is it a goal but something a love to do and will help me not burn out from running and everything else I try to fit in my busy schedule. I have found swimming to help me mentally not to burn out since it is a time to forget about things for a while and listen to the sound of the water and my breathing. I feel it has helped me to maintain balance and not let the fire inside get burned out with all the other things in life. It's a feeling of being on a different planet. Sometimes I feel I have gills and can breathe underwater. ( Note to Self: Do not breath underwater!) Other times it is a struggle to continue and each stroke seems to preventing me from moving forward.

I bought a bottle of Kraken rum as a reward for my new swim goal to be opened once I reach it. I didn't get the rum just because I like it. But rather it brings back to my mind good times with friends and so a bottle of it has special meaning to me. We all got to swim for something J. The motive is not the alcohol however it is my love for swimming. All life is a river, we can chose to swim it or let it take us to where we don't want to go. Sometimes however we need that extrinsic motivation in order to fuel our intrinsic love of something. It really has helped me get to the pool when it was cold and snowy and my bed was soft and warm.

    Having goals is important but sometimes the goals can seem overwhelming. This is why you need to take things one step at a time. Remember to rest and take it easy once in a while. But be reasonable with yourself, not kind, but reasonable. Listen to your body. I sometimes have trouble sleeping because I have a list of things racing through my mind that need to be accomplished for that day. Taking a day to do nothing (4/23/2011) and putting all your plans on hold can be a great way to unwind. This day of forced rest was in itself challenging and a test for someone who is crazy and wants to do everything all at once. Keep breathing air everyone and take one lap at a time.

-Barton-

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

zero run

As the thought of actually being lost entered my brain, I actually began to realize that I was actually lost. I think I missed a turn somewhere on this rainy, thundering night. The day started good. I went to work early with every expectation of getting my Mid-distance training run in after work. Until this girl I was seeing for the past two weeks said she was getting off of work early… that’s how it always starts. So putting aside my other mistress, running, me and her meet at Starbucks. I figured I wouldn’t just give up on all girls. Truth is I was happy to be single. Freedom. Well, long story short it wasn’t me it was her. The normal story which I was actually fine with for some strange reason. After we said our see you laters I felt like I should be upset, mad, something. I missed my run for this? It was thundering and pouring rain out while we were hanging out so I already was rescheduling the run some other time in the week. My mistress needs her time. I looked at my watch looking at a blank screen staring back at me. Just another stressor in my life. A runner’s watch is not just a watch, it’s a loyal friend. Besides shoes a watch is a crucial piece of equipment every runner needs. Time was not on my side. Instead of just stressing out over everything in my life. I, like an airplane on autopilot drove to the mountain bike trail near my job not worrying about all the stresses in my life. It was dark or close to it when I got there, not a soul around except for the bats. Throwing the watch somewhere in the car out of sight I threw on my run get up and started running. It was dark and rainy at least the thunder had stopped by now.
Maneuvering around the ankle high puddles proved to be an especially tricky skill to master due to the unusually tighter single track. Eventually the inevitable happened and I gave way to the puddles in the path, striding right into the muck. The rain kept on coming down. Then the thunder started again. This may sound like the beginning of a scary movie but was actually one of the calmest and enjoyable sensations I possibly ever felt while running. Not to be to hipster, but I felt like one with nature and the trails around me. It was impossible for me to be stressed out about anything that was going on in my life at the moment. Everything was dialed in. Flow. That sensation you get when everything just clicks. I felt like I could run forever. The feeling doesn’t happen often anymore but when it does it is always worth it. Being surrounded by this negative world and its ways can make you feel tired. It may sometimes seem easier to just go along with everyone else. You just have to get started in doing what is good. I repeat, just get started doing what is good and don’t talk yourself out of it. Sometimes it’s hard but by persevering in this beneficial goal you can achieve anything. Just have that positive mindset.
Flow doesn’t happen all the time but it is always something to look forward to and to strive for. Maybe it was the fact that my watch had died so there is no proof that this run actually took place. For all I know I could have dreamt it. That would explain the werewolf I saw among the flashes of thunder. I still never told me mistress why I was late to see her that day, but I was glad I met up even on a rainy, stormy day.
-Barton-

Wilderness 101

As I continued to climb and climb the cold mountain air freezing my lungs I wondered for how much longer it would be till I reached the top of the torrential path I was on. It felt like it was never going to end.
Well it all started when I heard about this 101 mile endurance mountain bike race in Coburn Park, Pennsylvania. I was not able to run cause of my left ankle so no run goal was present, but for some reason I could bike without much of a problem. I probably should have took it easy but I went ahead and signed up for this mountain bike endeavor hoping my ankle would be 100% by the time race day came around. It was close. I learned a lot about mountain biking from my short “training” program. First of all due to mechanicals and lack of motivation and ankle issues I didn’t train anywhere near what you need to in order to finish. In fact the race was the longest time I have spent on my mountain bike ever. I learned a lot about patience, I hope, from the art of mountain bike maintenance.
When the race got closer I started to change my goal and maybe just do some local trails or the like. NEVER NEGOTIATE WITH SELF. I told my mom about the 101 and asked if she wanted to go just to change it up. Something different. She could volunteer and I thought that would be fun for her as well.
After figuring it all out…just kidding. Nothing was figured or planned for this trip. It was very fast planning cause like I said I lost my motivation to do it.
My dad dropped my mom off at my job Friday July 30, 2010. I was sleeping in the car around 12:30-1:30 because I went to work super early to get out early. I awoke to the sound of my mom and dad conversing about my sleeping in the car. They parked right next to me. After some greetings, coffee, and pee breaks my mom and I were off. Sheila also came for the ride to try and led the way. The ride was exciting and fun, not knowing what was in store for the weekend’s adventure. We drove a good distance then got some more coffee and ate our awesome salads and hard boiled eggs (thanks dad). One of the best parts about going away on trips is the coffee during the long drives! My mom and I talked the whole way there never even turning on the radio. It took around 7 + hours to get there cause of the weird summer construction traffic. It was fine however since we were in no rush. I told sheila to take us to the elk aleworks Pub cause that was the only address I knew near Coburn Park, where the race started and finished. We got to the café and asked the closest person, “are you a biker and where do we go to register.” Of course he was and told us where we needed to go. The town was so small that chances are you were there for the race.
Coburn Park was about two miles up the road. It was dark so we almost missed it. When we entered the park we drove around looking for some source of light among all the tents and people. Being so dark and no light it was a little scary thinking I might run over someone or something. We finally parked it next to some older gentleman who after talking to and me getting in a picture with, I found out he was the photographer for the race. So we registered me as a participant and my mom as a volunteer. We got back to the car and ATE! Also had a little of Tuscano 2006 red. We walked around a little taking it all in while having some wine. It was so extremely quiet and peaceful up there. You would think with all the people it would be a party. So we finally settled down and crashed for the night. Well, my mom slept at least. I didn’t sleep even with the wine. I think I was too excited (always happens). I also got up to pee around four times just because I couldn’t sleep. I also got up fours times to pee just to give me an excuse to look up at the night sky. I never saw so many stars and so clearly seen. I felt like Abraham looking at the stars. Being that we increased elevation and that there is no light around it was surely the most beautiful night sky I have ever seen so far. It was the highlight of the trip for me.
The next morning I got up early, set up the bike and hopped on to test it out and proceeded to immediately slip on the loose gravel falling on the ground; it was going to be a long day. After reorganizing myself I went and grabbed two cups of coffee, one for me and one for my mom cause there was only enough for 200 people when 300 people entered the race. After people started waking up we made our way over to breakfast. I had the muffins I brought with fruit. (Trader Joes pomegranate bran, so good!!!!)
So the gun went off and we were on our way. I started in the back because I really wasn’t racing. My goal was to make it to the second aid station @ mile 40. This was where my mom was volunteering. Due to the elevation change, cold morning air, lack of training, I just wanted to get to the first one. It was also a straight climb for miles. I loved it! For the first 20 miles it was mostly gravel fire roads. Once I reached aid station #1 I chatted a bit, took some pictures with the volunteers and was off again, finally getting use to the mountain air. The very first downhill stretch I saw 2 guys that crashed. I stopped and offered help. I offered help and shouts of encouragement to everyone. On my way to aid station # 2 I talked with a bunch of people about a range of things. One lady had so many GU packets that I stopped counting them. Once I got there I went over to the table and ate 2 chocolate chip cookies to start. I think I only had a hammer gel and GU besides water and Gatorade. (Hammer gels are amazing!) So after inhaling the cookies I looked for my mom. Who, after much debt and confusion found out she had no chose but to go to aid station # 4. I thought she went back to the Coburn. So after being torn (I wanted to continue but did the smart thing and pulled a DNF) I really wanted to go more but cause of my ankle, I declined. I also thought my mom was waiting @ Coburn.
Mat and his little Honda Civic (my sag wagon) dropped me back off at Coburn. I found out, finally, that my mom was actually at aid station number 4. So after being denied food due to the fact it wasn’t ready yet I drove to aid station 4 to pick up my mom. I was a little annoyed about the lack of speed and sense of the race directors and everything that was happening. I was also starving… that might have been it. But then I meditated on all the fun I was having and all the positive aspects of the trip that even this whole situation turned from a negative to a positive. It’s all about how you view things, everyone’s beers should be half full. It’s of interest to note that upon arrival at aid station 4, I saw my mom with a walkie talkie. She was calling out orders and also the numbers of the bikers who were making their way through. It was very upsetting to know they had Swedish fish at this aid station. If I would have known that I would have definitely pushed it and kept riding and made it there. When we finally arrived back at Coburn after I stole the apparently nominated race director (my mom), we received our beer and food. Best beer ever and the glass was all the way full :). A bonus was that they also had hummus!
After having seconds we walked around by the river across the field and hung out before we finally set off for the trip home. In my opinion, not knowing what to expect made this trip much better than a planned one. It gives a sense of adventure (…on a plane with no plan right now. lol) I plan on doing this 101 adventure every year but don’t think it will be the same as this first time. I guess I will just have to wait and see.
The Beginning of anything is always the hardest but afterwards I am always glad I put forth the needed effort. Don’t get tired, it’s all in your head. Were always going to be tired if we keep telling ourselves that. Tell yourself you’re not tired and it will become a self-fulfilling prophecy. You can do more than you think. Do something crazy and you will see it’s possible for you to complete the task. Effort is all you need. This 101 endeavor was a tiresome weekend but worth the effort and memories. Mountain biking is awesome, period. It helps you to improve upon ‘control’. We all need to maintain control in our lives. Not letting things, (or in the case of mountain biking, obstacles’) or people (other riders) control you. RIDE YOUR BIKE. Don’t let it ride you. Don’t let injury, pain, or the trials you face let the negative into you. Once you fall off the bike (and we all fall) get back on, learn from the fall and continue riding.
-Barton-

February 2011 Essay

Remnants of Cape Cod


I don’t normally do this. In fact this was the first time I ever did it. Under the circumstances I felt it was ok as a rare treat.
As I woke to the sound of my alarm clock, which, is another rare treat for me as well. I immediately got up and then back down throwing on the cloths I laid out on the floor the night before, like a child getting ready to go play. After the odds and ends of race morning and finally arriving to the race tent I had just enough time to pin my race bib on and grab another cup of coffee they had present. They had Starbucks!!!
So the gun went off and away we went. During the race there were volunteers directing us at each corner as to which way to go and reminders to watch the ice that was all over the roads. It made me think about how we need to see what’s right in front of us. We need to be aware of the moment and deal accordingly. It is far more important however to look up and ahead at the long term goal. The Focus should be long term; you got to be aware of the immediate ice that we all have to deal with. But by focusing on the long term goal and continually moving forward with a positive attitude the ice is nothing more than a harmless puddle. Enough deep thinking back to the race…
So I navigated through the course and managed to avoid the puddles on the road. Surprisingly because I tend to daydream when I run and not pay attention to where I’m going and where I’m stepping sometimes. The course reminded me of the Cape Cod marathon due to the fact that we were running with gorgeous views of the Great South Bay along the route. The sight of the cool, crisp water made me want to go swimming, another favorite endeavor of mine. At about the 6 mile mark I noticed a runner with a blue flame beanie on. This may not seem like anything special but since I was wearing a red flame beanie I found another goal besides finishing. To beat this blue flamed runner! But I put it out of my mind because he was ahead of me already running from a turnaround point.
It just so happened right at the stretch to the finish line, I saw him. Leaving some gas in the tank I picked it up past him. He also picked it up and we ran even for a bit with the finish line in sight. I was expecting a good race to the finish, something I have yet to get so far. But after hearing the, ‘ah’ and seeing the fading shadow of the blue flamed runner disappear from the blacktop in front of me I knew he was done. After clocking in with a time of 1:27.32 I immediately went for my race day treat. To my surprise there was 4 to choose from; Golden, Toasted, Pumpkin, and Oatmeal. It was around 10:30 A.M., breakfast time, but I’m not talking cereal here. After a big quenching gulp of the Blue Point Brewery’s Oatmeal Stout I reflected on the race while talking to some of the runners and Brewer’s around me. I thought about stretching but instead took another sip and just hung out, had beer, looked at the bay, and took the best nap since the Cape Cod Marathon. Between the beautiful scenery and the nap (also the great beer) this was truly a remnant of the whole Cape Cod marathon experience.
-Barton-

January 2011 writing

CAPE COD MARATHON 2010



“I wish that car would just hit me.” This was how I felt at the beginning of the day in the early miles. The mental factor controlling my body was at an all-time low to the point were running was the last thing that I wanted to be doing.
The night prior to the statement above my mom and I drove up around 9:45 P.M. because of me getting anxious and wanted to start the adventure early. As always is the case when it comes to things like these. The drive up was great. My mom and I had some great conversation, never even turning on the radio for a second. I do missTommy and me singing up a storm while driving, when come the next day we can barely speak, but that’s a different story. We missed all the traffic on the bridges and after trying to find a diner or someplace to park the car and crash for the couple hours before the race we finally conceded to park it at the high school where the race was going to start. Apparently we were not the only crazy ones cause there were two other cars there doing the exact same thing…waiting for the start of the race!
I awoke early…as always seeking to explore. I found a dunkin donut truck unoccupied and open but my good conscience helped me not explore the inside for some free food. Eventually my mom woke up and we walked to a 7-11. There we found nothing good so we started to walk back to the school while stopping at a dunkin donuts for some prerace coffee and bagels…so good. Upon arriving back to the school after that long and cold outing we came back to find the dunkin donuts truck giving out free coffee and bagels. Figures.
After receiving my bib number we hightailed it over to the starting line where everyone was awaiting the sound of a gun to start the day’s activities. For me the race goal was just to finish. I was recently coming off an injury and it was just a personal test (each marathon is a goal in itself) as well as a way to get another state under my marathon belt. After the gun went off I waved good bye and started on the path before me. The scenery was amazing. I remember running along the sea shore staring at the beauty of it all. The ocean is so amazing. It always inspires me and makes me think of the creator of it all. It refreshes the soul and spirit. Despite the beauty, it was pretty cold in the morning. I was wearing my winter gear for the fact that the morning was freezing! Then it got hot. I eventually had to throw away my zip up hoodie I was wearing. Which wasn’t a big deal, I kind of planned on it anyways. I wonder where it is right now.
Along the way I talked to a number of runners. One guy I hung with was from a different country. I forget which one but I always love different culture and accents. After that I ran up to two guys that were in conversation and jumped into it. One of the guys was an older gentleman who was the most popular person in Massachusetts apparently. Everyone knew him and running with him actually made me popular. It’s all about who your associates are.
After parting ways with the older gentleman due to my small bladder I was back on my own focusing on the path as well as the scenery in front of me. The race had its ups and downs as all tests of endurance have. I got a little emotional toward the end which is where I always kick it up a notch and run my legs out to the finish. That’s been the theme of every marathon I have run so far, such an awesome feeling.
The aid stations where not the greatest. All they had was water and this weird electrolyte drink (cytolite) which I never tried before until this day. (You’re never supposed to try something new on race day) Besides the expresso love GU’s and the power-bar I had to help me along I found that the crowds at designated cheering stations to be a big source of encouragement. Toward the end I remember all the Scottish…or Irish bagpipe players that gave me a boost of energy by their enthusiastic playing. Their tones of energy streaming into my legs for the last stretch of the race.
4:12:02 was my official finish time. I was really happy to finish after injury and my mental state being the way it was that particular day. After I crossed the line I walked the mile or so to the car to get my cell phone to call my mom. Eventually after not being able to get her on the phone I walked back to the finish line to try and find her. Around and around we go. Finally after finding her we went back to the school to the basement where they were having the post-race party and food. That’s right, after running a marathon they want you to walk down a flight of stairs! At least this time I didn’t have to walk down them backwards due to the pain that sometimes accompanies marathons. I had some of the fruit along with the New England clam chowder. Best Clam Chowder I ever had! Afterwards we went to the bar at the finish line for a victory drink. My metal just so happened to get the attention of an old time runner who insisted on buying me a round of beers. Free beer and lengthy conversations about running, how could I refuse?
Before the drive home I took a siesta while the warmth of the sun hit my blue X-terra relaxing me after a long, cold, hard day. The ride home consisted of the usual; coffee, good conversation and a little bit of traffic. We also stopped at subway…spicy Italian with the works!!! O so good! It was great finally arriving back home after the long, tiring, and all out fun endeavor. My Dad was very proud of my accomplishment and it was great to come home to him, Jameson, and yes even mike. I’m not sure if I will do this marathon again but it was surely a great one to end 2010 with.
-Barton-

Hamptons Marathon September 26, 2009

What time is it? I remember wondering this countless times in the middle of the night only to find that it wasn’t time to get up. I wanted to get up but forced myself to lye in bed for the duration figuring it was what I needed to do. My first marathon was only a handful of hours away so sleep wasn’t so easy. I finally got up and ready around 4:45 A.M. after waking up my mom, who has been my racing enthusiast, and Jameson.
After getting dressed and fueled up my mom, Jameson, and I loaded up in the X terra for a nice, peaceful drive out to the hamptons. Well it was a drive to say the least. Despite the dog running into my rear window compulsively trying to attack passing headlights and getting her ear caught in the window we made it to the start/finish area.
By the time we parked and got settled to where we needed to be we had a little under 45 minutes to start. There was plenty of commotion and excitement around. Most of the commotion being Jameson seeing other dogs to scream at. Another interesting thing that happened before the race even began was that all this blood got on the back of my race bib, seemingly out of no where. No I didn’t poke myself with the safety pins, I’ve learned that lesson before. My mom was helping me with the bib and shoe timer and cause of Jameson’s constant pulling on the leash made my moms hand bleed all over.
Looking back on all the craziness of race morning kind of prepared me for the race in a way. I didn’t worry and wasn’t anxious at all. I didn’t have time to be. Regardless of that I still wouldn’t change a thing cause it added to all the excitement.
The time finally came to get in line and ready to go. After some last minute pictures I disappeared into the crowd and immediately struck up a conversation with another runner. Runners are some of the most friendliest people you will ever meet.
When the gun finally went off we wished each other the best and followed the sea of people in front of us. I never ran with so many people around before, it was quite interesting. Before I knew it we reached the split mark for the marathoners and the crowd of people immediately disappeared. Leaving me and the few other marathoners in my vicinity to trek through the beautiful country roads.
I remember all the aid stations and the support that were at every mile. I talked to a couple runners as I was running, but for the most part let my mind ponder on things and also focus on the task at hand. We ran along near wide open fields, near the beach, and even through some backcountry dirt roads. I remember at one point I felt like crying. I’ve gotten this feeling occasionally on long runs and I guess you can consider this a long run. The feeling comes out of no where, usually after the feeling that this is probably all a dream, go figure. Anyways after the mix up of hormones dissipated I got back into the swing of things maintaining my robotic like motion to the finish. My goal was just to finish. In the back of my mind I wanted a 4hour 30minute marathon but would have been happy just to finish. At mile 25 I realized I had about 15minutes to go till the 4 hour mark. So knowing this I stepped it into high gear. I was surprised by how much I had left in me. I think it had been the track work I did Monday nights. I blew past all these people. I wanted someone to step it up with me but I guess everyone at this point was spent. I remember being thankful for all the track work I did around this time of my race. I reached the finish line at 3 hours 52 minutes and 57 seconds. With excitement and awe being surprised I broke the 4 hour mark.
My Mom and Jameson were right there to congratulate me. The race was surprisingly easy. Don’t get me wrong it was hard and painful at times, especially afterwards. I loved every minute of it. It was easier in a sense that the training, the journey, to get there was the real challenge. Intervals, low blood sugar bouts, loss of a toenail…again, and early morning headlamp runs were just some (and still are) of the challenges I faced along the way. The funny thing is I brought this type of training onto myself. There were times when I had a run scheduled and forced myself to go do it, always glad and happy afterwards. Training really does help you be more focused.
So after I got my metal and tried to remember where I was again I found my mom and Jameson. I say this because at some point in the race due to lack of sleep and running this long run I didn’t know where or what state I was in. Maybe I was dreaming, this feels like a dream. It took me a while to stop moving. It was painful to stop so I had to walk around in circles with this confused look on my face for a bit. That was fine everyone else was doing the same thing.
After settling down I got some food and played in the athletes village for a bit before the long walk back to the car. When we finally arrived I got situated in the back seat and proceeded to hold onto Jameson for the entire ride. I was in such a good, positive mood I didn’t mind. I remember talking a whole lot, eating a whole lot and having to ask my mom to pull over a whole lot because of all the fluid I inhaled during and after the race. It was all in all a very good day and wouldn’t have changed any aspect of this crazy, fun, and exciting day.